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Fun & Games
The rude parrot
David received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an obscenity. Those that weren’t expletives were, to say the least, rude. David tried hard to change the bird’s attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything he could think of. Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird, and the bird yelled back. He shocked the bird, and the bird just got more angry and more rude. Finally, in a moment of desperation, David put the bird in the freezer, just for a few moments. He heard the bird squawk and kick and scream, then suddenly there was quiet.
David was frightened that he might have hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door. The parrot calmly stepped out and said “I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’ll endeavor at once to correct my behavior. I really am truly sorry and beg your forgiveness.” David was astonished at the bird’s change in attitude and was about to ask what had made such a dramatic change when the parrot continued, “May I ask what did the chicken do?”
Traveling down the interstate and needing to use the restroom, I stopped at a rest area and headed to the
lavatorial facilities.
I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying, “Hi, how are you?”
I’m not the type to start a conversation in the restroom, and I don’t know what got into me, but I answered, somewhat embarrassed, “Doin’ just fine!”
And the other person says,
“So what are you up to?”
What kind of question is that? At that point, I’m thinking this is too bizarre, so I say, “Uh, I’m like you, just traveling!”
At this point, I am just trying to get out as fast as I can, when I hear another question, “Can I come over?”
Ok, this question is just too weird for me, but I figured I could just be polite and end the conversation. I tell the voice, “No…I'm a little busy right now!”
Then I hear the person say nervously…“Listen, I’ll have to call you back. There’s some guy in the next stall who keeps answering all my questions.
Cell phones…don’t you just love them?
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